Bueller, Bueller, Bueller, Anyone? Bueller...

Ok, so here's the deal. I know I haven't put up a new post in a week. I also know I have barely visited anyone else's blog in the last month or so...well, several months. I know I have been getting a little slow on replying to e-mails, answering IMs and even returning phone calls. Yes, shame on me. Which as I write this, it also reminds me to call my Mom back. Sorry, I swear I'll do it the very second I hit "publish" on this post. In short, I've been a bad blogger and a not so good correspondent. However, I have an excuse. Not a new excuse. It's actually an overused excused, but an excuse none the less. My excuse - I've been busy. I know it's not original and often not acceptable to say, but in life there are priorities and my priorities right now don't consist of blogging. I know, I know, please dry that tear that is streaming down your face. It will be ok, I promise. Despite the fact that I try to make time to write, I struggle to find inspiration in which to fuel my writing and therefore I continue to fall short. My forehead hits the desk.

It's a little bit of depression, a little bit of frustration. A little bit of anxiety, a little bit of stress. And a whole lot of overwhelming. My priorities lately consist of juggling my business, working on completing my masters, selling my house and of course trying not to be so indecisive in my selection with this new place I shall soon call home. On top of all of that, throw in the holidays. Then try to squeeze in dating, friends, family and a little "me time"...which there seems to be less and less of. It can be enough to make anyone feel overwhelmed and rightfully so. Now for the good news...

An entire makeover of my blog is currently in the works and nearing completion. A custom layout that is long overdue. I'll also be renaming my blog (once again) and doing some reorganizing of the archive and other aspects on the main page. It's on track to be implemented before January 1st. So stick around. I'll make it worth the wait. I think. I hope. I'll at least try my best. I shall do my utmost.

The Doctors of Tomorrow

The Doctors of Tomorrow

In what has become an annual tradition, I addressed the second-year medical students at the University of Pennsylvania today. After sharing my medical history, with a particular focus on the nutritional and pulmonary issues that arose while I was in college, I answered questions from the students.

Interestingly enough, most of the questions I received did not pertain not to the specifics of my disease. I was asked, for example, whether I had any siblings (yes, two younger sisters) and how my disease has impacted them. Another interesting question was about my relationship with my friends.

My favorite question was about the technology I use on a daily basis. I nearly brought the house down when I described the arguments I have with my voice-activated environmental control system (see my entry from 10/12/06). Cursing under my breath, I explained, is the only way to blow off steam at the system without eliciting a response from it.

For me, the most touching moment occurred when all of students in one of the classrooms (I addressed three separate groups) got out of their seats and gathered around my wheelchair as my pulmonologist explained the settings on my ventilator.

It was obvious that they truly cared. Translate that into a hospital setting and you have some pretty good doctors.

Just Hangin' Around

Just Hangin' Around

This post is part of a Winheld's World series on the equipment on which I depend on a daily basis.

No, that's not a medieval torture device pictured above. It's the Hoyer lift I use to transfer me between my bed and my wheelchair and between my wheelchair and the toilet. The lift is a major back-saver for my caregivers, but it is also the safest and most comfortable way for me to be moved.

As you can see above, the lift's metal chains connect at four points to the nylon sling on which I sit. The sling, pictured below, has a cut-out for toileting purposes. Thus, it is of the utmost importance that the white sling be properly centered under me!

Funny story: When the hydraulic pump on the lift started to wear out a few years ago, using the toilet proved to be quite the adventure. Every two minutes, my attendant had to come in and raise me.

"That's fastest you've ever gone to the bathroom," she remarked afterward.

Damn right!

Anyway, several companies beside Hoyer make patient lifts. There are various styles, including some whose slings can be removed once the person is sitting in his or her wheelchair. My style of lift, actually called the Hoyer Classic, is considered a dinosaur by many in the healthcare field.

Forgive me, but they aren't the ones whose asses are hanging in the air. Call me old-fashioned, but I'll stick with what's familiar when I'm the one up there!

The City Bakery, In Search Of The BIG Brownie

If you know me, you know how much I love the show "Sex And The City"...and no I'm not gay. I always have to declare my heterosexuality anytime I declare my love for that show. Why? Well because how many straight men do you know that could give you the ins and outs of Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda and of course Samantha's lives? Seriously, if Trivia Pursuit made a SATC edition, I would clean house! Some will find that fact pathetic. Others will find it adorable. I'm just going to own it because it is what it is and that is me - pathetic and adorable. If you are a true loyal SATC fan (yeah, real fans abbreviate and speak in code), then you remember The BIG Brownie episode. You know the one where Carrie runs into Adien's new girlfriend Nina Kats, the girl who works for SNL. Nina gives Carrie "the face". Carrie is devastated by "the face" and is reading into the multiple possible meanings behind "the face". Good girl pal Samantha reassures Carrie the best way she knows how, by buying her chocolate, it's consoling. But not just any chocolate. She takes Carrie out to lunch at The City Bakery and talks her into getting The BIG Brownie. Nothing puts a little happy on a girl's face like chocolate and nothing will wipe the image of the Nina Katz face away like chocolate. In the form of what else, The BIG Brownie. That Samantha...slutty AND smart!

Walking thru Manhattan you will find there is no shortage of great places to eat. From fine to casual dining and anything and everything in-between. As I'm walking down the street the other day, one place comes to mind. One food comes to mind. One Nina Katz face burned into my brain. I know what I need to do. I need to go in search of The BIG Brownie. I must stop in to eat at NY's infamous City Bakery. You'll find this little cafe between Fifth and Sixth Aves. 3 W 18th St to be exact. Among the street construction scaffolding, you'll see the big white banner screaming the name "The City Bakery" and quietly whispering my name. It calls out to me..."Psst, David, over here. Come get a brownie. Carrie likes it, so will you." I succumb to the pressure, turn the corner and find myself where Miss Bradshaw once stood. Although it didn't look like The City Bakery featured in the show, I believe it has been renovated since the taping. Still, it's the home of The BIG Brownie!

Sadly, there were no BIG Brownies to be had that day. Instead they had an assortment of other sinfully good sweet treats just waiting to be devoured by sugar hungry New Yorkers. Despite the fact that their Oatmeal Raisin Cookie was highly raved about and recommended to me, I opted to go for a Chocolate Chip Cookie. It's not your standard chocolate chip cookie. This one you could almost hear yourself getting fatter as you ate it! I think I paid $3.50 for that single cookie, but it was money well spent. You could taste the layers of butter and sugar, which would later lay in my stomach aching. The gooey chunks of chocolate in every bite, mmm. I think I tasted a little love baked right into it as well. When I finished eating, it was Nina who? Yeah chocolate will do that to a girl...and apparently a guy too.

The City Bakery may not be the best place to eat in NY, but it has it's pluses. If it's good enough for my SATC girls, then it's good enough for me. Besides, how can a girl (or guy) go wrong with one of the best selection of baked goods? I think NY Magazine summed it up nicely...

"In a city of insipid (if not downright dangerous) salad bars, City Bakery's is a thing apart: gorgeously eclectic, culinary inspired, effortlessly seasonal. When Mother Nature gives us juicy heirloom tomatoes, savory chef Ilene Rosen gives us delicious tomato sandwiches. She also gives us caramelized French toast and a mildly spiced Mexican tortilla soup, among too many other delectable things to mention. And once you've had your tofu-skin-and-edamame salad, you can reward yourself with a cup of Maury Rubin's signature chocolate, hot or cold. Like its pretzel croissant, the City Bakery is a true original."

Excuse #1365

Thanksgiving thru my eyes. Let me break it down for you...

Food = Good.
Lots of Food = Very Good.
Mom's Home Cooking = Very, Very Good.
Leftovers awarded to this cooking-challenged bachelor = Priceless.
Me not cooking = Something EVERYONE can be thankful for.

Hope your holiday was equally swell.

I had a similar drawing that said "Eat Me" on it,
but felt it probably wasn't the most appropriate art piece
to decorate one's cube with.

I'm too full to blog. So there will be no new posts until I digest some of this turkey and/or sweat out the gravy.

Side Note: (Are there still starving people in Africa? If so, someone send a turkey leg. I'm too selfish to share my bird remains. Sorry.)

If I Did It, This Is How I Would Of Done It, But I Didn't Do It

If there was a "Sick F*ck Of The Year Award", OJ Simpson would win it hands down, with black leather gloves on. Finally, sanity reigns. Decency gets CPR. Integrity staggers to its feet. And the power of the people is reasserted. Today, News Corp announced it would cancel its television interview and book with OJ Simpson. "If I Did It" was replaced with "It Isn't Worth It."

That only happened, of course, after an insurrection took place. A popular uprising in which angry citizens not only voiced their displeasure, but flexed their economic muscles. Viewers reportedly were organizing boycotts of the sponsors of the scheduled television interview, in which Simpson would discuss how he WOULD HAVE committed the murders of his ex-wife Nicole and her friend Ron Goldman IF he had done it. Granted, just about everyone involved believes he did it, so this was simply going to be an interview with someone who got away with murder and was gloating about it for profit. It was about as disgusting a spectacle as had ever been prepared for the public airwaves.

The TV interview was all set for November sweeps. After all, if you're going to try and capitalize on the brutal murders of two innocent people, what better time to do it than sweeps? Here's an idea for sweeps week...how about I field dress OJ and make a nice butterfly filet out of him? People would want to see that, right? It's just good wholesome family entertainment around the old boob-tube. Remember, a family that eats together, stays together. Anyone for steak? Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to actually filet him. But this is how I would do it, but I'm not going to do it. Yeah, we live in a sick world.

If You Want PS3, Then You Better Be Packin' Heat!

Be afraid of a nerd, be very afraid! Unlike normal people, you know the "cool kids", nerds don't fight if their girlfriend is in danger. Nerds don't fight for their girlfriend because nerds don't have girlfriends. Nerds don't date. Nerds are busy at home masterbaiting to Lara Craft. Nerds are camping out at their local Best Buy for 3 days straight to get their boney hands on the highly anticipated new PlayStation 3 gaming consol. By nature, nerds aren't fighters. The majority of nerds aren't hostile creatures. When shoved into a gym locker, they have the tendency not to come out swinging. They will stand there with a sweaty jockstrap on their face in silence. However, say the magic word...PS3...and the maylay begins! Nerd on nerd violence breaks out. Robberies. Shootings. Stabbings. Beatings. You name it. It's all done in the name of the PS3.

In Hartford, Connecticut two armed thugs tried to rob a line of people waiting for a new PS3 to go on sale early this morning - one man was shot when he refused to give up his money. In Sullivan, Indiana a man is in critical condition after being stabbed when he and a friend tried to rob gamers of consoles they waited 36 hours in line to buy. In Fresno, California gamers were arrested after a riot ensued when Wal-Mart opened their doors to PS3 customers. The huge crowd of people trying to rush into the store led to many being trampled in a parking lot. If you actually made it into a store and bought a PS3, you would hear stories like this...

A shopper was surrounded by 5 men and beaten for his new PS3 just minutes after he bought it. And if you made it to your car with your new PS3 in hand, teens would approach you carrying chains and tire irons, demanding your console as you were unloading the box in your trunk. Other incidents around the nation included people getting stabbed over the PS3, store employees being held hostage at gunpoint and drive-by shootings.

Nationwide, short supplies of the PS3 and strong demand led to long lines of buyers, some waiting for days outside stores. Only 100,000 units were available in Japan when the PS3 went on sale there about a week ago. In the States, just 400,000 units. Once the doors opened Friday, they pushed and shoved their way to the shelves to get at the limited supply. The new PS3 is such a hot item that many people bought one just to turn around and make a profit from it, selling it on eBay. The retail price of a PS3 is $600 and the going price for one on eBay is, get this...$9,000! Yes, the price of a Kia car.

If you didn't get a PS3, then congratulations because you are probably free of bodily harm this weekend. Sony says they will have another shipment out before Christmas. This Monday, Nintendo will release their new gaming console, the Wii. It's expected to retail for $250 and hopefully people won't be getting killed over it. Just to be safe, I suggest you strap on your 50 Cent bulletproof vest and slip your glock in your sock. Nerds - go hard or go home.